Ungh..

We're going through another rough time together... It's just that... *sigh* I dont know what to do anymore..

An Open Letter (two of 'em)

Dear lady on bus route 38L,

I understand that you get into the mood listening to your music. But when you start making annoying gestures, other commuters find it uncomfortable to sit around and watch you jerk your head forward and backwards. Also, the bug eyed sunglasses dont look good on you. Also, if you'd turn down the volume and let your eardrums recover, you'll notice the bus was quiet. But you had to start mumbling words off key and banging your foot on the floor. My advice, get doc martins. Those wont make any noise. And also, leave the ipod at home once in awhile...

Z


Dear guy with sunglasses at 25th avenue bus stop

You are a moron. I saw you try to open the back door with your hands, but obviously, the buses now employ a hydraulic lock to keep people like you and other fare-evaders out. If the big signs with the *STOP* DO NOT ENTER FROM REAR DOORS tip you off, then the back of the ticket should. You will be FINED! FINED! now that money could have bought you a pair of sunglasses or some decent shoes, but you seem miffed over buck fifty. Oh and next time, have your money ready and stop wasting my time in line at the money machine.

Z

Dear Russian woman on the 38 Ocean Beach

The man cant find 50 cents. Get over it. There's no need to take it out on him like that. Drivers are usually nice and let the person ride free. And you scolded an old man! You spent 5 minutes of my life waiting at 17th avenue. You shouted at him so long, the lights changed. Twice. You even pushed away the young man who tried to give him the bus fare. God, you are a genuine bi***. You know that don't you. And I know what you mean in your Cyrillic tounges. I said Geprobulgh..

Z

Well....

So yeah, I was... damn. I hate it when I forget what I was going to blog about. I had a really good idea earlier... somewhere... Fu** I just cant...

breakdown

Now it happens... 12 years after his death that I start to cry. Thinking about it, and talking about it... I'm ashamed of myself. I was excited to be riding in a limo, not knowing that everyone else was in grief over the death of my grandfather... At that time, I was young and barely was in touch with my feelings. I'd only cry when I'd get hurt, but not when someone died. I still had no idea what dying meant...

Today was rather depressing... Talking with some people out in Penn., about the death of her fiance/boy friend and how he was shot. The drugs killed him. Then I start talking with Kim to find out that their cats are being kicked out and might be put down... I start talking with her and talk about my grandfather... Before I did, I wasnt sure what direction to move in... I start to cry, a little at a time then I just broke down. Holding in the feelings living my life with only one grandfather... not cool. No one should ever lose a loved one to lung cancer, but that's their style of life. To date, I believe he should be about... 85... I cant go on...

AHA!

I found a loop hole! I found a loop hole! I found a loop hole!

*dances and sings*

You might wonder what lil ol' me might be so happy about. I figured out a way to get my liscence. If I actually had decided to make a post at 11:40, it would have been rather depressed and emo'y about how I cant get my liscence until 18. Which I cant. But anyways... Thanks to a beautiful angel by the name of Lauren, i've developed a sure fire method on how to get my liscence in the next 8 months or so. My 17 & 1/2 birthday isint until a few days, but until then, i'm going to study the manual from top to bottom. Then on or after my 17 1/2 birthday, i'm going to take the permit test. At that age, a verification of DE/DT is not required to get the permit. So now I'll have a permit! Granted if I pass the test. So the six months until my birthday, will be devoted to learning to drive and practicing. And once my birthday rolls round, I can get my liscence straight up since it's not necessary to bog a legal Adult with the necessity of taking Driver's Ed or Training. But i'ma going to have to take training anyways. So Fingers crossed and i'll have my liscence soon!

eeep!

I just have to say... the spiders are getting freakishly huge this summer in my house. The other day, I had to kill one the size of a walnut. Literally. Not one of those daddy long leg ones... I get ones the size of tennis balls here. But those ordinary little black house spiders. But this one was huge. it was shaking it's ass at us and wiggling it's fangs around at us threatening to ruin the breakfast cooking on the stove...

Science Quotes...

I cant help but find these funny. I'm going to use one for senior quote

"I have a sore throat."
2000 BC : "eat this root"
1200 AD : "That root is heathen, say this prayer."
1500 AD : "That prayer is superstition, drink this elixir."
1800 AD : "That elixir is snake oil, Take this pill."
1900 AD : "That pill is ineffective, Take this antibiotic."
2000 AD : "That antibiotic is artificial, Here why dont you eat this root." — A short history of medecine.

"All that glitters is not gold, but at least it contains free electrons."

"As an adolescent I aspired to lasting fame, I craved factual certainty, and I thirsted for a meaningful vision of human life — so I became a scientist. This is like becoming an archbishop so you can meet girls." — Matt Cartmill.

"Keep your stickers out of my science book; I don't paste crap in your bible."

the AOL search archives

Users in the comments are pissed off at the idea that people can be arrested for planning a crime like murder, calling it minority report like. I ask you why is it that americans have no problems arresting people that are planning or researching how to conduct terrorist attacks? Yet if a person plans on killing his wife that is ok, until he actually does it? How many people do you have to plan on killing before its ok for a company like AOL to hand your records over to the government? I am not taking sides, I’m just pointing out the obvious double standard. This story will open a can of worms, and will decide just how private your data online really is.

http://research.aol.com released a list of 20 million + searches by 500,000 AOL users. Contained in this list are social security numbers, credit cards and other personal information. There are some truly scary things in this database.

There are hundreds of searches from people looking to kill themselves and even more scary are searches from users that seem to be looking to commit murder.

Check out the search history for user 17556639, most recent search is at the bottom of the list.. Does this look like the search history of a user wanting to do something bad?

17556639 how to kill your wife
17556639 how to kill your wife
17556639 wife killer
17556639 how to kill a wife
17556639 poop
17556639 dead people
17556639 pictures of dead people
17556639 killed people
17556639 dead pictures
17556639 dead pictures
17556639 dead pictures
17556639 murder photo
17556639 steak and cheese
17556639 photo of death
17556639 photo of death
17556639 death
17556639 dead people photos
17556639 photo of dead people
17556639 www.murderdpeople.com
17556639 decapatated photos
17556639 decapatated photos
17556639 car crashes3
17556639 car crashes3
17556639 car crash photo

This is the very data that google won a legal battle to keep from the government. What is going to happen to the search industry now? What are peoples privacy rights? If people are using AOL to search for ways of killing their spouse what should be done about it?

I think because of the data contained in these search results the government is going to be taking a lot closer look at the search industry and things will definitely change.

Techcrunch has more on it here talking about the stupidity and coming fallout that AOL is facing..

Courtesy of: The Paradigm Shift

Magic Bum

Today on McAllister st, I was walking up to my office when I came across a bum. He was wearing and most likely still is wearing a purple satin baseball jacket. He carried a cane and seemed like most bums. But when I walked by, he took his cane and poked a door kick on the courthouse building. He asked the door... "Is that some kind of Heat refelction ray?". I was all like: WTF? So yeah... As I left, he added: Does it give off magic heat? Cause my radioactive jacket can deflect it..."

I bought aviator sunglasses for my little brother's bday...

Finish and Start of: Space for Nothing

So i'm going to ramble today about the needless amount of waste Americans go through each year. When it comes to either cars, housing or storage space. But i'm mostly going to bitch about the first two mostly because storage space is actually used *gasp* what a shocker!

I can remember back to about 1995 or so. But not entirely. It was a time when cars no bigger than a big screen tv dominated the scene. Cars that existed were more like the toyota camery and honda civics. These were small cars then. But look at today. Modern society has turned us into shopping machines. If you take notice, or watch cribs on MTV, you'll see one person who owns like 5 or 6 expensive large cars. Now, that's alot of cars for one person to own. But when you're made like that, sure why not? But is it economical? No. People have begun a new trend of buying more than you can afford. These people get poor work and yet, they're buying a 40,000 dollar car and adding 10000 dollars worth of wheels, stereos and whatchamacllits. Who needs a freaking TV on the side of your car? The people of this nation must learn to utilize money and space as well as the earth grows smaller and smaller each day with every person born. Out on the freeways, the majority of cars are sedans, but for every three sedans on the road is about 1 SUV. And when you pass by one of these cars, you see just one driver. Sometimes a really thin looking girl. Kinda like a latino whore or something. With the bikini strap and big ass sunglasses. But aside the point. These small persons are driving cars like the big chevys or GMCs or Cadillacs. There is no point for people to own cars like this. There is one person at Alameda High I would put on the pedastal for a moment. A rich girl who shall remain nameless. I've seen her drive a large chevy suburban down the street completly alone. She even almost ran me over once on Tybourne. Reckless driving kills people. Even her brother who crashed his 50,000 dollar car, just like that. Purchased a new one. The gangster life is just a fad. Do these people have any idea how fugging stupid they look in big ass sunglasses and wearing panty hose on their heads. No offense to any of my friends who may be one of these "characters". But I digress onto another topic. The sort of people who buy these large vehicles. Without a doubt will never need all the space. Unless one day, they end up driving around dead bodies or robbing a bank.

Onto the topic of housing. In the past 10 years, there has been a massive housing boom. Why? Because of all the wealth held by the upper percentile of the wealthy in the nation are buying second homes. Second. Let me say. Sure it's nice being able to sleep in your own sheets and bed somewhere else. But that's what a timeshare is for as well. With this new growth of wealth in a medium sized percentage of americans, they've decided to take the opportunity to excercise the wealth by purhcasing more and more of America itself and squeezing the poor into further poverty. Cause and Effect. The rich purchase more land and housing making it difficult for the poor to get by and still live in houses. Sometimes, the 2nd home is more expensive and not even lived in. In Hawaii, on the way to Kiholo bay, you had to walk past this giant yellow colored mansion. There were hammocks stretched out on trees and what not on the beach. But was the person enjoying this wealth? No! He probably wasnt even there at all. The good Hawaiian government luckily made it against the law to purchase a beach in Hawaii. But we know how shrwed some of the rich are. They extend their properties right to the edge of the beach to prevent people from reaching the beach. By purchasing the land around the beach, the persons going to the beach are forced to go around through wild scrub and not trespass at all.

So America, your land of freedom and wealth. Have your people become any better? Yes and No. Your childrenhave embraced civil rights and equality. But not the rights of everyone to access the nation's wealth of beauty and landscapes. But I digress... So americans. Make use of your money. Dont spend it on vehicles and housing. Buy a gun. Makes a great holiday gift.

insomnia

I think i have it. Ever since i came home, i cant sleep. Also, my use of the capital "i" has died along side...

vacation

Enjoy yourselves while i'm on vacation for the next week and a day. I'll be back by the 28th so dont miss me too much...

I killed something pregnant!

Oh yuck...

I'm working in the atrium by my window today. I 'm just clearing dirt from the house walls when I find a roly-poly bug to play with. So i'm rather fascinated by it. Whoops... I drop it several times... And then I start flinging it in the air and it hitting the shovel when it lands. Seems fun. But usually... the roly polies would curl up into balls when they're being attacked. I thought that seemed odd so when it stopped moving alot and it was on its back, i took a twig and poked it's stomach.

What happened next made me sick beyond relief. The stick pierced its stomach releasing a small amout of fluids and little white roly polies. I realized then, I killed a pregnant roly poly. But another oddity. They began to move around and started walking all over the spade. My mom has a good look at them and then I set to killing them as well. So either, it's a mass murder or a genocide. You decide. Was me killing roly polies genocide or murder? Young baby r-p's. Think about it. Sure they're just babies... but they're gross and disgusting as well as garden pests...

On a lighter note, My mom ripped out a timer box from the wall and we found a whole bunch of rolie polies with their color sucked out thanks to a giant spider we found under the box.

Space for Nothing

I've begun to notice a large and very costly trend spreading throughout the entire nation. A new craze that has spread through the entire minds of several and the majority of citizens. The need to purchase space that would never be used.

I'm tired. I'll continute tomorrow...

musicgasms

Last night, Zach took me to the symphony! :D

so, first off, i had to put MY OWN makeup on... D: that was bad... then when i wasnt even done, HE SHOWED UP to pick me up! D: i was not ready at all.. then his mom dropped us off at the

shit happens

It really does when you think about it. You take shits when you need to, and you get the shits when you eat really gross food. But one thing i've noticed the past few weeks. Ever since me and Kim started dating, we based things that are very very similar between us as "orange". So with that in mind, we really start to notice how orange the world is. Traffic cones which you could only give a second thought about started to appear everywhere. Construction vehicles were orange, as were signs and buttons and clothes. A blog I regularly haunt: www.cynical-c.com came out with a startling article that stunned me. The Baader-Meinhof Phenemonom. And I quote: " You may have heard about Baader-Meinhof Phenomenon before. In fact, you probably learned about it for the first time very recently. If not, then you just might hear about it again very soon. Baader-Meinhof is the phenomenon where one happens upon some obscure piece of information– often an unfamiliar word or name– and soon afterwards encounters the same subject again, often repeatedly. Anytime the phrase "That's so weird, I just heard about that the other day" would be appropriate, the utterer is hip-deep in Baader-Meinhof." So that's the jist of it. It's truly real.

http://www.damninteresting.com/?p=417

Adolf Elizabeth Hitler

So, Saturday. It started with Girl Scout daycamp training... Where I met 2 girls who will be aiding with me, I thought they would be bitchy, but they aren't...

Anyway! On to the more important portion of the day... So when I finally get home I realize D: Oranji has called 2 times already! NOT GOOD! So I go to call back when O__O he calls me and O__O he'll be there in 15 minutes! NUUU!!! I ran to get on some more deoderant, get on my pants, shoes, brush my teeth and start putting on my white shirt when he knocks. Oh no! *Dad opens door* He's in a button up flannel! D: *must. change. shirt.* So I grab something, start putting it on when I realize he is INSIDE THE HOUSE! NUUUUU!!! I gently push him out the door, and we go to the car... My house... It's ugly. I don't like it. I don't really want him looking at it... because it's ugly.

He played soooo beautifully at the recital! I wish I could see his hands... And his brother played nicely too, especially his dance of the dates. Oranji played a cookie song too, several, I thought those were really cute and I was thinking about the affect of octaves with cords and how that will paint something completely different in your head if you move your hand a half a step higher. This is why I love the piano, multiple voices on one instrument [fucking KICK ASS!!!!!! xD]!

*Back to oranji* So after the cookie story and the music, we got to eat COOKIES! His mom made cookies... They were good *remembers yummmm* I liked them... And they went well with the cheese cake later! :D

So we went to his house and went to his room. His house is incredibly clean! O___O *blink* really clean... I really love it... I loved the whole atmosphere! It was really comfortable... And his room! THE CARPET! SO CLEAN! *dies* he said he spent 5 hours cleaning yesterday, I guess he did alot... It was very nice... I think his house was the opposite of my house, in every way... *hating own house*

His mom is a good cook... the meat was great, the brocoli was great, the potatoe salad was great, the garlic bread was great! I think it was all from scratch! AWESOME! *dies* I was tempted to take some home with me... I think I ate twice as much as Evan did and I think more than Oranji ate too... BUT IT WAS SOOOO GOOD! I don't know if his parents liked that I was eating so much... I couldn't tell... They were good conversation!

So while we were in his room, I found a ring. It was a really pretty ring. I put it on and he didn't seem to object. It only fit on my ring fingers [how ironic] and later, during the producers, I put it on his index finger, it looked so hot on him... He tried to show me how to play guitar but my fingers were too stuby to strum a chord and I lacked finger strength to hold the strings down hard enough... The Ukileli was alot easier to play but still hard. Eventually we wound up on the floor, making out and listening to good music [he has good music] and me signing his year bjork [like a year book but not].

When we went on our walk, we walked kinda far and tried to go on the swings at Bay Farm school, but someone messed them up and another was swinging in the way [I was kinda glad we didn't swing, my hips are too wide so it hurts... >_<]... I was so sad that he was leaving for San Fransisco, I wanted to give him a gift of some kind but I didn't have anything on me... *is determined not to lose ring* anyway, our walk. So we were walking down the usual residential areas in Bay Farm when we saw a play structure and so we tried to climb it [we kissed in a cheesy movie type way] when I hit my head! *ouch* it hurt really bad... But his hug dulled the pain. ^___^ I love his hugs... while he & i were nursing my wound, these kids were staring at us from behind a plastic yellow slide! so we decided to play along and fake makeout so they could be entertained and completely curious, but then, we started to really makeout, that didnt last very long because the children were distracting and funny to watch... [plus I felt kinda rediculous, makingout with my boyfriend for CHILDREN??? o__O]

Then we went to the beach type place and climbed a tower, where it was windy, we found some empty bear bottles [clearly someone had a good time last night!] and we threw one off the tower! it didn't break tho... but it was trown, and we were trying to fill it with sand but it wasn't working so we just tossed it. Then we saw a titanic type shape cement thing and wanted to be totally just like the movies so I stood like rose in titanic and he was jack. I don't think we did it right... but i didn't care cuz then we started making out, man i love kissing him...

THEN we watched the producers! where we were informed that hilter's full name was Adolf Elizabeth Hitler! he had apparently come from a long line of English queens... during the entirity of the movie, my arms were being iced [thank you oranji, i really appreciated that] and oranji and i, we were cuddling! ^___^ I hope his back wasn't strained, and was being supported, but I couldn't tell usually from where I was positioned... the movie was really funny! i liked it... at one point, I was laughing so much I thought I was going to puke! D: but then, I didn't. towards the middle of the movie, we had green tea and cheesecake! YUMMM! and more of his mom's cookies and other cookie like things! oooooooh it was all sooooo good! ^______^ his mom is a good cook.... I brought my parental units some cheesecake too when I got home...

When he walked me up to my door, I showed him my room... I think it's bigger than his, but I have more stuff. I only let him peek because i was so ashamed of it... [he'll probably insist I clean it...] D: all he said was 'wow' as if a tornado had just blown threw a shanty town... V____V i dont like my room either... there was music stuff everywhere, my instrument on the floor, comp on, dirty clothes bin full to the rim, crap EVERYWHERE!!!! D: *hopes he wont break up with me cuz it's so dirty*

anyway, we had lots of fun but I think my house ruined the entire night! D: up till then, i was really having a great time... and was loving this sweet good bye until next weekend [hopefully]... anyway, i think this date wasn't as romantic as our first [exactly a week prior to this date] but i thoroughly enjoyed it more... [better food invovled and more him and me time!! xD] i love him so much... and i hope he has an excellent time at his new job, learning and making new friends! we will call eachother every night! and we will talk about day camp and his job! we're so orange together!!

I got to watch him walk away again and he looked hotter than ever! and i will miss him while he is gone...
kimiko.

Saturday... Pwnsome...!

What could I say? My mom and I had spent the previous day watching movies until 2 AM. So we go to bed and I wake up at 9:00 and realize someone left me a message. It was Kim calling to tell me that she was at day camp. Ok, no sweat. I'll just enjoy the day until the recital.

2:15... Oh crap! Why wont she pick up? *Panic* Uh, Uh, Uh....

2:30... Helo? Ah! I'll be there in 15 minuites.

So on the car ride over, my dad kept obsessing over which street her entrance was on. So after tuning out, We arrive there and I walk in. For the first time, I realize how small her apartment was. An altar took up one corner and a curtain thingy was in the middle of the room. So, i'm waiting for her to finish picking a shirt and I notice there's tons of stuff everywhere. We go out and it's a relatively quiet ride over to Amy's. The recital went off with about 5 ro 6 hitches in my playing and after that, we had cookie time. Ohmigosh, mom's mothball cookies, tasted just like virginia's. oh... yummerz. So after we finish all that, we go home. I noticed that Kim was scratching alot and I started to become concerned when I saw her arm turn white. Damn you histamines! So we get home and I show her upstairs before dad said: no closed doors, no funny noises ok? Flushed embarassed, I continue up and show her my guitars, and clarinets and library. Then, I pull down my yearbjork and I got her to sign page 69. I put on my Creole Jazz cd and we're just laying there on the carpet and we're just kissing each other. A thought of panic rushed into my mind. We're in plain sight from the staircase and my brother's room. Oh crap. Oh... oh... oh fuck that.... mmm... Ah, I start showing her other stuff and we're just holding each other. So me and her go down for water and we decide to go out for a walk.

On the walk, we go out to Bay Farm School and show her around. At first, we had trouble climbing the fence. And we left passing a rough bunch of people. And we're walking down kofman and we stop at a playground in front of the lagoons and we're playing around on this. And we kiss on the monkeybars and she bumped her head twice. She climbed down and I held her for a while. In my perphrials I saw two young kids looking at us curiously around the slide. I tell her about it and she laughs. We start mock kissing and these kids are really into it. They're running all over to get a view of it. Afterwards, I mentioned, maybe when he goes home, he's going to start kissing his sister. and his excuse. "I saw a boy kissing his sister". heh... dirty thoughts. So we come to the "23" tower and we climb up to discovered a case of emptied becks beer. I throw one down. And we're just kicking the bottle around. Silly us.

We also come up to the ship thing. We pretend to be on the titanic scene and then it just becomes kissing. We're walking back and we realize what time it was and we're running home for a while. Past the multi-million dollar homes. When we did get home, Kim said she was still tired... heh...

I turn my comptuer, show her some things and Yakitate. Who wouldnt love an entire anime series about a bread making boy? Then we stop and we're just listening to Franz ferdinand and I try to teach her guitar. then Ukulele.

At dinner, it was rather quiet, but man was the food good. Aparently, Kim eats alot of Ramen and boxed stuff. Shameful... I hope she comes over more often. The potato/egg/bacon salad... KICK ASS...oh... i mean.. PWNERIFIC! XD. So after that, we watched the Producers which is a really good movie. Anything with Will Ferrel and Hitler is bound to be good. The hop hop clop clop was really awesome. So I bring her home and she gives me a glimpse of her room. Which must say. Was extremely messy. That was the first girl's bed room i've been in of a girl who was my age and I was in love with. We stand back outside and her cat comes by. *kiss* then smile and a long time to leave....

Wednesday Special: melt

Ohh, tonight. What can I say about tonight? I had gotten a ride over to Mel's to go bowling with Kimiko and her friends and Vivian. So after three frames and 75 dollars, we're watching Sarah and Jennifer playing each other at DDR and we're rather bored now and we leave. (BTW, I won 2nd frame and second placed in 3rd frame). So we wander over to starbucks where I buy her soda and myself a vanilla cremå and as a bit of advice, get it hot. No matter how hot it is outside. If you get it chilled, they pack the damn thing in ice, so you get less. So after being shooed out, we wander to mervyns and browse jeans and sunglasses. Kim made me wear these extremely effiminate sunglasses. So then we find ourselves in the shoes department where we have shoegasms over a pair of grey and white Vans I found. OMG, they were totally sexy. I hope they'll have some by the end of summer. MMM... so after awhile, I call home and I'm to be picked up on central and park. Eventually, we make our way to the Burma cafe and vivian wander to tuckers to avoid our PDA. FIrst french ever. I'd tell more, but my readers, I have standards! But it was so romantic. The cars driving in the background and the lights going out. We could ahve embraced forever, but alas, Father time, you screw me again. Alas, my stomach rumbles for no food passed since 5. But that kiss filled me up.

The man formerly known as Exhausted

After my spartan date yesterday, I had a goodbye kiss from Kimiko...

That night, My back ached, my head hurt and my legs felt weird.

Call me superstitious, but outside forces feel that's good

Yes, I know that last sentence is poorly worded and phrased. And poor in general...

But after 10 hours of sleep, I feel right as rain.

Cant wait for bowling tonight..