Fart

You never think about it much do you? I mean sure, as a kid, you would always laugh at the kid who let one rip in the middle of class. Ridicule him into a small little quivering lump of embarassment and then scar him for life. But today, I had a very mind jogging conversation about farting with Lisa and her sister today. Quite.

Levis: Motherfucking nice ass jeans

I will come before you, a humble man, as well as a man with the knowledge and truth of uh... me. I am talking about *da da daaa!* Levis Jeans. Those of you who know their awesomeness, you are dismissed. But those of you otherwise, stay awhile.

Why I felt like bringing this up was pretty much the fact that they're awesome in the most awesome way. You have all the styles to choose. Skinny straight, Skinny Relaxed, Skinny Boot, Low rise skinny, Low rise boot, Low Rise straight, Straight, Boot cut, etc.

I personally, am partial to the 527s. My first pair of real Levis Jeans that were bought specifically for me. In previous cases, I've had one pair of my dad's old 70s 501s, several pairs of 541s and a strange pair with a heavy leather label. I know i'm probably missing several other pairs, but forget them for now. The 527s are the ultimate in pants if you're looking for something durable, and goes well with work boots. Every week, i'm on a construction site and 527s get the job done. Granted, Levis has become more of a designer than the utility type of jeans, but some still are used on sites.

Pairs I want:
569
501 (that fit)
559

"Why Didnt you do something?" said the bitch

So i'm at my friends house today when I'm helping out a little in their front yard, cutting branches from their mulberry tree. When this woman with some sort of large bulldog or boxer walks by. Out of nowhere, his dog runs towards the larger boxer and starts to I suppose mingle with it. But the boxer explodes and attacks his dog and naturally, his dog will fight back. Like 10 minutes earlier, his dog had encountered some other dogs and was fairly friendly, but I suppose when that boxer saw the dog charging out to play with him, he started to attack. I should know, i've been to his house on several occasions and when I ring the bell, the dog usually runs up to me and barks. I know better than to ring the bell from now on. So after staring at the little tiny woman struggling with the dogs he pushes his dog away and scolds it.

But what's worse is afterwards, she looked at me. And then to his uncle who was working with the long loppers and started asking: "Why didnt you do something?" She said that several times again and what was I to do? I stood there blinking. Look lady, I dont own a dog so what the hell do I know about dog rearing? You're the woman with a fucking boxer. You should be able to handle it. Why cant you hm? Cause you buy a god damn huge dog and live on bay farm. Your idea of walking the dog is to drive your damn dog out to the main island, that way you can shop and look at crap you wont buy. Seriously, i've never seen dogs fight until that moment. I've seen a dog chase a cat, but that's about it. It's almost like watching a nature program. I'm not likely to interfere with nature. I dont walk up to the television to try stop the lion from eating the gazelle. No, I watch since men have this weird almost inevitable fascination with fighting animals. Seeing this was almost like watching a nature program. It's all new to me. So you tiny whore with dog, you manage yourself. You're on their property.

I dont even know why people buy big dogs. I believe there should be some sort of regulation over the size of dog you can own. I mean come on, this woman looked like she weighed about 110 lbs and could barely lift a crate of light bulbs. And yet, she's walking in the street with one of the feistiest dogs on the earth. It's like a person, trying to live in a studio apartment with 40 cats or 2 great danes. Granted, if the person was a tall strong person, then yeah, they could manage the dogs. But this woman cant even control her dog. Lest even put on it's collar properly. It had also slipped out of it's collar. I watched as she slipped it on, over its ears easily.

As she walked into the depths of hell, she stopped by one of my friend's neighbors and told the whole story from her viewpoint. *gaah! what a bitch!* And then she drove off to her cow shed on bay farm. I still cant get over the fact that people drive their dogs to their walkies now. What is this world coming to? I thought there was a ban on bulldogs and boxers. They're known as fierce animals. Yet this tiny woman has one. Honestly, who would have won? My friend's smaller Jack Russell Terrier? or her Larger Boxer? From what I know, his dog is very friendly. After the initial barking, he's calm and has those puppy dog eyes when I sit at their table.

She had the Chutzbah to call Animal Control afterwards.