May 28, 2006


I'm bored as hell. Someone Entertain me... Please?

May 20, 2006

I bought a chink a drink

So this is fellow countryman, Lukas "Ching Chong" Mott. I bought him a drink that cost $3.75

It was damn expensive.

May 19, 2006

Late Review: A Midsummer's Night's Dream AHS

I recently went to see Alameda's production of Midsummer's by Wm. Shakespere. It's a story of boy and girl in love. Other boy loves girl but girl doesnt love other boy. Other girl loves other boy, but other boy doesnt return love. Father of girl wants other boy to marry girl, but girl and boy run off to do it in the woods. Fairy King sees other girl and other boy chasing each other trying to have love, and fairy king instructs puck to spread stuff on their eyes to make them love each other. Acting company with juggler, mechanic, nerd, refined man and charlie are putting on a play. Charlie plays the girl. And refined guy plays the lead. His head is changed into a donkey's. I'll leave it at there. To prevent the spoilers. So what did I think of the play? I loved it. It was a very good production in a 1960s format with hippies and the period dress. I espically loved the play within a play. The Tragedy of Pyramus and Thisbe. Oh i wish I had gotten a film copy of it. Props out to charlie for playing a girl, falling off the stage and stabbing himself with a cardboard sword. He makes such a pretty lady. When he does stab himself, he stabs, then a squeaky cute "oh!" comes out. Lysander and Demitrius were played by good actors. Nick with the giant muscles and abs. Ok, it's late. Goodnight.

Great America

Review of the day. So I wake up at usual, around 6:30 AM. I eat a hearty breakfast (a slice of sourdough with spray on butter.) and arrive at the Parking gate around 7:28. I'm worried the buses have already left me behind. So i've rushed to the front to discover everyone still waiting. The spanish trip bus has already left and we're just standing there. So the AP students board the first bus and of course, we Physics P students get left behind. I'm in shorts, and it's cold as hell outside. So eventually, our bus comes. 1 hour after. And we get there, with good traffic. So we ride rides. Here's the fun part: I'm going to do a review of each ride I went on.

Carousel Columbia:

Basically, it's a merry go round on top of a worse merry go round. I spent most of the ride staring at a liquid acclerometer which barely did anything. When I did push it down, it seemed to read even higher. But the ride offers great views of the park from a certain height and angle.

3 out of 10 thumbs up


our second ride of the day was our first upside down ride of the day. Apparently, today, Nick Tag lost his "Virginity" (first upside down ride) on the vortex. The vortex is where you stand on a platform and it throws you at a magnificent height. For this one, instead of staring at a accelerometer, I was staring into the face of Ivan's ancient calculator. It seems, when you have a focus on an object, you tend to lose the feeling of where you are. Since I stupidly was staring at the thing, I didnt scream, nor did I notice how the ride was. But I could feel the outside forces.

5 out of 10 thumbs up

Rue le Dodge

A strange name for bumper cars. But means, street of dodging. Except in bumper cars, you dont really dodge other cars so much as side swipe another person and give the finger as many times as possible. This one, I was really jostled around and I couldnt help but feel malicious and rear end some fat fremont students. Not the most exciting but very fun. The cars were pretty cramped and I could barely get my leg to fit in between the steering column and the side of the car so I could operate the pedals

6 out of 10 thumbs up

Top Gun

This has absoutley have to be my most favorite ride of all time. I lost my "virginity" to this ride 2 trips ago. This time, I was much smarter to hold the calculator (Dr. Dauber's much faster one) lower and actually enjoy the ride. You sit this time and you go up a incline about 8 storeys up and begin your steep descent to end up in a loop de loop, then a cork screw over people waiting in line. Next you're brought over a man made lake and here, it felt like the greatest force ever. It really felt like I was flying through the air. That sort of feeling... like going WHOOSH over at this part. Always loved it, always will.

10 out of 10 thumbs up

Drop Zone

Here, we moved to the otherside of the park for the day. And now, we dragged Mr. Galaway with us. Matt Bar... decided he didnt want to go on this, so he took Andrew over to demon to ride alone. So we get in line. And whilst in line, aparently, the "white" group had lagged behind this fat lonely looking woman "shooed" them. And once we reach the bend in the line that would eventually split into two groups, she was talking to Mr. Galaway like there was no tomorrow. She poured out all over him. We think she even turned around to use one of those quick brush up pads from colgate to hopefully get a kiss from him. Luckily, we managed to pull him away. I had to wear the data vest on this ride and the xyz accelerometer was uncomfortable as hell. So we get on. It goes up pretty quickly, and here's the quote of the day.

"Hey nick. We're pretty high up arent we?"
"Yeah man, we're high"

I pressed two. Woosh. Scream. Yell. Yes. Yell. the magnetic braking sounded like farts. It was awesome. We took a look at the calculator and saw our results. line line line Jump to the top of the screen. Back down. line line line. We shuffled out as fast as possible to avoid crazy cat, brush her teeth in line lady.

8 out of 10 thumbs up

The Grizzly

Ah, nothing like a roller coaster built of lumber. I had to return the calculator first and then cut in line to catch up with the rest of our friends. Ah cutting. Is there anything more glorious? Yes. Pizza for dinner. But I digress. This ride is the bumpiest ride that I've been on all day. Yup, bumpier than bumper cars. The whole thing would vibrate as it rolled down. Not much to say other than My knees had a hard time fitting into the rear seats of the cars.

7 out of 10 thumbs up

The Demon

When you say you lost your virginity, we mean it's your first time on an upside down ride. How cool would it sound to say: I lost my virginity to the demon. Sure demon is a strange form of the devil to use, but it's cooler than losing it to the Centurion. What could I say? Here, I lowered my sling bag and it pressed against the key fob that was on my pants. THe thing opened up and I lost the key for the lock on my calculator pocket. I have a spare, but i'm hesitant to use it. But back to the ride. It's the smoothest ride i've been on. It rides like a cadillac. It starts off with a stinky tunnel that smelled of old rubber. Then it takes you up an incline. Down once. Looppy de loop. Another one, a tunnel, soemthing. Then another tunnel and a triple corkscrew. During the whole time, I was with Mr. Galaway and he kept laughing like: Ha Ha Ha Ha. Not really laughing, but the more... laughing in the face of dagner type laughing. My first time on the demon too. I'm still pissed about the key.

8 out of 10 thumbs up

So Now, it's time to go home. We've all collected ourselves at carousel columbia and we go home. I'm trying to do the packet on the bus, but it's waaay too loud. I managed to get some things done. I gave up. Who cares? Excellent day. I got 4 numbers from my friends. Excellent day eh?

May 13, 2006

Review of: Dracula

Bram Stoker wrote his book: Dracula, in 1897. Nearly 30 years before the movie Nosforatu and 106 years before the movie Van Helsing. The most recent movie, when watched before the book will provide much confusion in reading as the two editions dont even match up. Except for a character named VanHelsing in each. Whereas in the book, he's an old man with super religous powers and the other is an actor who also is wolverine. But by and by, i'd say it's a pretty decent book, worth the 3 dollars I paid for it. At times, the book would get very wordy and I instantly lose focus. Another poor feature is the footnotes. They're great help, apart from the fact that I have to constantly keep flipping back and forth between my reading and the notes themselves. So that's a poor feature by the wordsworth editors. Not much else I can say, apart from the fact that it's a great book and I whole heartedly reccomend it. If you dont occasionally mind the stabbind with stakes and cutting of the heads. Neuvyageeen havelen glaven!

May 08, 2006


So today was the day to donate blood at school. Obviously, i'm nervous as hell, but I'm confident. So I leave 2nd period to the gym and they had me some documents to read over. AFter that, I sit in some cheapy plastic chairs and they pull me behind a partition for a screening. Name, DOB, etc. So then she rubs my middle finger with an alcohol pad, then uses some thing to cut my finger. Tests and stuff. So then it's question part. She asks me if I wanted to be alone to do them. I said no, and she kept insisting on me being alone. So then She sent me over to the other side of teh gym for prepping. So i'm sitting there, and this guy takes me to a chair and then I sit down and then he stuck the damn needle in. It was so huge. It was like the size of a point for pumping up sports balls. It hurt like hell. So for the next ten minuites, i'm just sitting there, rolling the hand ball they gave me in my hand. The blood tube vibrated occasionally and it would hurt like hell at the last moment. So i'm done, and the guy pulls the needle out and then it strikes me. Blood is really really dark. I never took it for that red. So then, i actually feel fine. Unfourtunately for the girl next to me, she aparently fainted when she left. So i'm sitting there with Pablo, (he couldnt donate again since he had donated less than 100 days earlier. We sit there talking and it's about 1/2 way through 3rd period. I eventually go to class. Luckily, no notes.


Today, I declared a wager between Jeff Stallman and I. Concept sketches of the "new alameda high school". Anyone interested in participating, come see me at school, or email me.

May 03, 2006

Dr. Lukas' Magic Wonder Cure-all Rejuvination Tonic

On sale next week, yours only for the low price of 1.40 and 3 buttons. This is not a hoax. 1.40 and 3 buttons will really get you some of his magic tonic.

May 02, 2006

From this point on

As of May 2st, 2006 at 1540 PM. All further posts by Snowman will not be thought out, logical, make any sense, or have a meaning/purpose. They mean what they say and will remain and hold their true meaning, which is no meaning. Even if it is flagged and stuff. I dont care if I'm branded a retard. But I choose to be retarded to non-intellectual abideing, free-riding persons.

May 01, 2006

From this point on

As of May 1st, 2006 at 2212 PM. All further posts by Metro_gnome will not be edited. They mean what they say and will remain and hold their true meaning. Even if it is flagged and stuff. I dont care if I'm branded a racist. But I choose to be racist to non-law abideing, free-riding persons.

Darwin Awards

You all know about the Darwin Awards - the annual honor given to the person who did the gene pool the biggest service by killing themselves in the most extraordinarily stupid way.

Last year's winner was the fellow who was killed by a Coke machine which toppled over on top of him as he was attempting to tip a free soda out of it.

This guy has to be this year's raging favourite:

The Arizona Highway Patrol came upon a pile of smoldering metal embedded into the side of a cliff rising above the road at the apex of a curve. The wreckage resembled the site of an airplane crash, but it was a car. The type of car was unidentifiable at the scene.

The lab finally figured out what it was and what had happened.

It seems that a guy had somehow got hold of a JATO unit (Jet Assisted Take Off - actually a solid fuel rocket) that is used to give heavy military transport planes an extra "push" for taking off from short airfields.

He had driven his Chevy Impala out into the desert and found a long, straight stretch of road. Then he attached the JATO unit to his car, jumped in, got up some speed and fired off the JATO!

The facts, as best as could be determined, are that the operator of the 1967 Impala hit the JATO ignition at a distance of approximately three miles from the crash site.

This was established by the prominent scorched and melted asphalt at that location. The JATO, if operating properly, would have reached maximum thrust within five seconds, causing the Chevy to reach speeds well in excess of 350 mph and continuing at full power for an additional 20-25 seconds.

The driver, soon to be pilot, most likely would have experienced G-forces usually reserved for dog-fighting F-14 jocks under full afterburners, basically causing him to become insignificant for the remainder of the event.

However, the automobile remained on the straight highway for about 2.5 miles (15-20 seconds) before the driver applied and completely melted the brakes, blowing the tyres and leaving thick rubber marks on the road surface. The car then become airborne for an additional 1.4 miles and hit the cliff face at a height of 125 feet leaving a blackened crater three feet deep in the rock.

Most of the driver's remains were not recoverable; however, small fragments of bone, teeth and hair were extracted from the crater and fingernail and bone shards were removed from a piece of debris believed to be a portion of the steering wheel.

Epilogue: It has been calculated that this moron nearly reached Mach I, attaining a ground-speed of approximately 420 mph.


Zz Yy Xx Ww Vv Uu Tt Ss Rr Qq Pp Oo Nn Mm Ll Kk Jj Ii Hh Gg Ff Ee Dd Cc Bb Aa

Tadah. backwards!

The English Alphabet

Aa Bb Cc Dd Ee Ff Gg Hh Ii Jj Kk Ll Mm Nn Oo Pp Qq Rr Ss Tt Uu Vv Ww Xx Yy Zz